Here There and Everywhere

Expat wanderer

Royal Treatment

It’s back to Purgatory for me – the start of two full days travelling to get back to Kuwait. The day dawns cool, but the clouds are high and the roads are dry.

Seattle is undergoing a major infrastructure upgrade, and most of the lanes on the major interstate close tomorrow. Public announcements are on all the radio and tv stations about finding alternate routes, and today was the last day all lanes would be open. I was afraid traffic would be heavy, so I started early, but it was surprisingly light.

Turned in the rental car, got checked in, everything is cool so far. Go to stand in the security line and – as usual – I get sent to the “Royal treatment” line.

I am so used to it that I don’t even groan any more. I have my computer, my little plastic bag with face cream, mascara, etc. all in one bag, and I have little footies to put on when I have to take off my shoes. I am SO prepared.

What I am not prepared for is for them to tell me in an angry voice to take the liquid out of my purse. I say – as all guilty people do – “I don’t have any liquid in my purse!”- and they throw my purse at me and tell me to go through it and take out the liquid, and they give me a small plastic bag.

I go through my purse again – it has a lot of zips and pockets – no liquid. I put a very humble look on my face and hand it to her and say “there is no liquid!” and they yell at me “she’s going to take it!” and they run it through again. And then I have to wait in a small booth (again) for the full bag hand inspection for explosives and for the pat down check.

Those who know me will know why this is so funny. I am not dangerous looking.

They pat me down. They magic wand me. They tell me I can put my shoes back on as they wipe down my handbag and my carry on. Guess what – no liquid. They stamp my ticket, but . . .no apologies, no nothing. Just “you can go now.”

I’ve had this happen for five years now, almost every trip. It doesn’t matter whether I pay cash in person or pay by credit card online – I get the royal treatment.

On top of that, my plane is seriously delayed. They are bringing in another plane to substitute for it. I hope I will make my Kuwait connection – and I really really hope I have time between flights for a shower. I’ve also lost my KLM card somewhere in all these changing flights and confused reservations and they are being stinky about believing me, even though my frequent flyer status is on my ticket, on my boarding passes and in the computer. More royal treatment.

August 13, 2007 - Posted by | Adventure, Counter-terrorism, Customer Service, ExPat Life, KLM, Kuwait, Travel, Weather

3 Comments »

  1. hahahahaha very Purgatorian 🙂

    Comment by Purgatory72 | August 13, 2007 | Reply

  2. ugh – poor you. and so, so weird that it always happens to you. I’ve bought Beirut-originating tickets both here and from the states and I never get screened.

    And – HOW RUDE of the security screeners. VERY un-Seattle of them.

    Safe travels back home and welcome back to the region 🙂

    Comment by adiamondinsunlight | August 13, 2007 | Reply

  3. Purg – SO right. Airports are SO Purgatorian!

    Thanks, Little Diamond! Thanks for your sympathy and for understanding how UN-Seattle it is!

    Comment by intlxpatr | August 13, 2007 | Reply


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