Here There and Everywhere

Expat wanderer

Puns Galore!

Thank you, Kit-Cat! Some of these are really, really BAD.

Puns for those with a Higher IQ
(That would be you and me, of course) 🙂

Those who jump off a bridge in Paris are in Seine.

A man’s home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.

Dijon vu – the same mustard as before.

Practice safe eating – always use condiments.

Shotgun wedding – A case of wife or death.

A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.

A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.

Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion.

Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.

When two egotists meet, it’s an I for an I.

A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it is two tired.

What’s the definition of a will? (It’s a dead give away.)

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes.

She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.

A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

If you don’t pay your exorcist, you get repossessed

With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

You feel stuck with your debt if you can’t budge it.

Local Area Network in Australia – the LAN down under.

Every calendar’s days are numbered.

A lot of money is tainted – ‘Taint yours and ‘taint mine.

A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

A pun is its own reword.

He had a photographic memory that was never developed.

A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large.

Once you’ve seen one shopping center, you’ve seen a mall.

Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.

Santa’s helpers are subordinate clauses.

Acupuncture is a jab well done.

May 27, 2010 - Posted by | Humor

5 Comments »

  1. 🙂 good one yet again!! though a couple of them were a bit on the high order level! 😉

    Comment by onlooker | May 27, 2010 | Reply

  2. And others were low level! 😀

    Comment by intlxpatr | May 27, 2010 | Reply

  3. WONDERFUL!!!!!!!

    Comment by momcat | May 27, 2010 | Reply

  4. LLOOLLL!

    Comment by intlxpatr | May 28, 2010 | Reply

  5. The badder the pun the ‘gooder’ they are! 😛

    Comment by Mathai | May 29, 2010 | Reply


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